Throw Zombies Off the Plane

Jesse and Helen Kalisher and their two young children were on a flight from Las Vegas when zombies began to attack, beating in one man's skull with a spiked club.

One frenzied zombie drew back the club -- still dripping with blood -- to bash in another skull when the good guy showed up and blew him away with a gun.

These days, you have to pay for a bag of pretzels on a plane, but the gore and violence are free of charge.

You see, the scenes described above played out not on an individual's DVD player or computer or iPod, but on TV screens spaced throughout the cabin of the airplane.

The images might be easy enough for grown-ups to dismiss. Not children.

"If corporate America were to take children, strap them down in seats and force them to watch violent images on TV screens, people would be outraged," Helen Kalisher said. "That's essentially what is happening here."

Luckily, the Kalisher children slept through the zombie massacre. Their parents, however, were set in motion.

After the flight, the Chapel Hill couple began writing letters to airline officials.

Most didn't respond. A flight attendant told them that the planes will be refitted over the next several years with individual screens.

Well, that's great, said the Kalishers. In the meantime, though, their photography business has them jetting around the globe. And their children -- all of our young children -- are a captive audience.

On a flight from Europe, they held the children in the galley during "Mission: Impossible III," which opens with Tom Cruise being tortured and his wife being held with a gun to her head. Later in the movie, the wife is forced to electrocute Cruise to short-circuit an explosive chip that has been implanted in his brain.

On other flights, they encountered faces melting off ("X-Men"); teens getting shot and run over by a car ("Gridiron Gang"); and a guy getting speared in the chest ("King Kong").

You get the picture.

Helen Kalisher stressed that she has no problem with the movies themselves. She and her husband rented and enjoyed "Mission: Impossible III."

But she doesn't want her 1- and 3-year-olds watching.

Earlier this month, the Kalishers launched a Web site and online petition (to date, only 228 signers) to encourage the airlines to do something.

Options: They could edit the films more heavily (sex scenes are often cut).

They could replace the films with inflight TV programming. Sure it's banal. But what do you expect from companies that make you buy your own snacks?

They could create a family-only section in which monitors can be switched off. Seems to me that would please adults who dread sitting near families with children.

With all that is going on in the world, the Kalishers don't pretend this is an earth-shattering issue.

"It's a small thing," said Jesse Kalisher, "but one that can be easily fixed."

If only the airlines would wake up and listen.

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