Say It Ain't So, Joe

As much as I fuss about the airlines, the worst news lately is that the guvmint is going to help passengers by telling the airlines what to include in the price of a ticket.

Lord help us!

You’ve heard/read about this. Some in guvmint think airlines should be required—forced might be a better word, methinks—to include baggage fees and taxes in every advertised/quoted ticket price and to hold all reservations for 24 hours, during which the customer can cancel free of charge..

Good goshamighty—doesn’t guvmint have enough to do, what with a bankrupt economy, tons of debt, and public hatred of Congress? And don’t the airlines have enough problems making a buck already, without more interference?

Think of the problems. Before quoting a fare the airline would have to calculate checked baggage fees for a jillion different trips. Baggage fees can’t really be included in advertising quotes, unless it is known who will check bags and how many.

Yes, I do remember with pleasure the days long ago when I could reserve a flight, thus tying up that seat on that flight, then cancel it at the last minute at no cost. It was nice. On the other hand, airfares were so high then that we hoi polloi couldn’t afford to fly.

That law will definitely increase airline costs, and raise ticket prices. No doubt about it.

Didn’t we decide, once and for all, back in the 1970s for crying out loud, that the guvmint would stay out of ticket pricing? Since then, haven’t airfares dropped like a Ponzi scheme gone bad while the safety record has improved to an unbelievable extent? During the same time, haven’t taxes skyrocketed while guvmint services have gone to hell? Now you tell me the guvmint is gonna improve things by interfering with the airlines?

I am reminded of the plea a kid made to baseball player Shoeless Joe Jackson after the major league baseball scandal in the 1919 World Series: “Say it ain’t so, Joe.” Legend has it that Joe never answered the young boy.